Chivalry is not dead. Here are 12 things I'm teaching my boys about how to treat women.
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Chivalry is Not Dead & My Boys Know It

Chivalry is not dead. Here are 12 things I'm teaching my boys about how to treat women.
I have the privilege of raising two little boys each day.

They are rowdy and rambunctious. They wrestle and tackle and sword fight several times a day.

They make funny noises and laugh like crazy when they do.

They eat all.the.time.

They put holes in their jeans and play with worms.

They are growing so fast. I ask them to slow down, but they don’t. They just keep growing and changing and learning at a speed I can barely keep up with.

When each of my boys were born, the Lord gave me two words for each them. I have them written down in my prayer notebook, and as I teach and nurture my boys these words aren’t far from my mind.

Samuel (oldest, 4 years) :: Strong & Courageous

Timothy (youngest, 18 months) :: Humble & Compassionate

I pray these words over my children frequently.

What I have found most interesting is that my oldest is humble and compassionate while my youngest is strong and courageous. I believe the Lord has given me these words as my focus of cultivation in each of their lives.

It is my prayer that my boys will grow into Godly men who love and cherish God’s Word above all else. I pray, too, that they will be men who cherish women as a gift.

They may be young, but I’m daily teaching my boys about how to treat the women in their lives. Chivalry is not dead and my boys know it. Or at least I want them to know it!

Here are twelve things I’m teaching them, even now, about chivalry.

1. Open doors – They are too little to hold most doors, but they try. Daddy helps them open doors for Mommy often.

2. Ladies first – This is especially true when it comes to food. Ladies go through the line first. And anywhere else appropriate to allow ladies to go first.

3.ย  Never hit girls – Not even in play. Not even if she likes to wrestle. Not even with Mommy. We never hit girls.

4. Give up your seat – A woman should never stand while you sit in a chair or take a seat on the bus.

5. Check on a hurt friend – If a friend falls and gets hurt, you check on them. You don’t continue frolicking and rough housing without first being sure your friend is okay. I don’t care if you caused it or not.

6. Pick up items others drop – If someone drops something, help them pick it up. A lady should not be on her hands and knees digging under the fruit stand for her dropped peach. This happened to me.

7. Save the last bite of food – As delectable as the cheesecake is to your taste buds, the last bite should always be offered to the lady. Don’t be a pig without self-control.

8. Family is a gift – We cherish family and time together. There’s no place like home.

9. Be a thoughtful gift giver – Study what others enjoy so you can give thoughtful gifts.

10. Learn how to cook simple meals – One day, my boys might be husbands. They should know basic cooking skills so they can relief their wife from cooking duties from time-to-time (or often).

11. Walk on the outside of the sidewalk – Protect your lady, whatever it takes. Watch for cars.

12. Put the toilet seat down – Put it down every time … after you wipe it clean.

Do you have boys? How are you raising them to be chivalrous?

By the way, one of the main ways I am teaching my boys to be men of God is through His Word. I created the Fruit of the Spirit Curriculum for Toddlers as a way of introducing them to God’s Word while teaching them early learning skills. Learn more here.

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12 Comments

  1. These are great tips! I have three girls but I want them to be treated this way by the boys around them. I want them to know that they don’t have to settle for anything less. My dad always opened the door for me when I was a teen, and I noticed it among the guys I hung out with at university – only two men out of all my friends opened the door and let me go first. One is now my husband. ๐Ÿ™‚

  2. Some of these I’ve thought about with Titus. Others I haven’t though. Not going to lie I don’t worry about the toilet seat- I expect the area to be clean when Titus leaves the bathroom. But I don’t put the seat up for him so I don’t make him put it down for me.

  3. Thank you for this!! My boys who are a few months younger than each of yours are the opposite… My oldest is strong and courageous and needs to grow in compassion and humility and vice versa with my youngest. I haven’t even thought about cultivating chivalry in them… What a great idea… Especially since it doesn’t come naturally to my oldest who can comprehend more!

  4. A lot of good tips on here! I also taught my 4 year old son to open doors for his sister and I, and say “ladies first”.

    I thought number 7 was funny, I’ve never heard of that before but i like it!

    It’s so important to teach boys how to treat their mother, it determines how they treat their future wife! Also they watch how daddy treats mommy, that’s the biggest influence I think.

  5. Great list, but for #11 I’ve taught my boys that the tallest person should walk on the outside. Mothers care for their children and older children care for younger, as well as men caring for women.

  6. Oh, I love these ideas…and introducing them EARLY is the best. Dad will always be their first example, so it’s great that he’s helping them along as they practice chivalry!

  7. This is awesome! I have tried so many times to implement this. How do you get them to do it? My oldest doesn’t get the girls first idea.LOL

  8. Love this too! I have 3 boys, 3 1/2, almost 2, and 9 weeks! We are busy and messy, but want them to grow into God’s mighty men more than anything. Great tips on things to be intentional about! ๐Ÿ™‚