mark and leigh-1

Dear God, Will You Ever Give Me the Man of My Prayers?

On April 23, 2007, I wrote the following in my beloved journal:

Dear God,

I want a Christian home. I want to raise a Christian family. One that goes to church on Sundays, is involved with the church, and prays together at night. I want a husband. I want a spiritual leader.

Lord, will this ever be true for me?

I want that man who prays for me, and I pray for him. I want a man that prays with me. I want a man that takes everyone to church on Sundays. Who’s involved with the kids at church. Who smiles because he’s drunk in love with YOU! Who relies on You.

Lord, will this ever be true for me?

I want a man who is unconditional in his ways (love, gifts, kindness, helping hand). Who doesn’t expect things in return – EVER. Who accepts the world as it is and doesn’t let it affect his walk with You. I want a man who wants to change the world.

Lord, will this ever be true for me?

I want a man that knows You!!! I want a man that will accept Your blessings even the small ones. A man that makes me feel like he can make a mountain out of a mole hill even if there is no dirt or rock to make one with. I want a man that is positive and understanding. A man that makes me push to be a better person. A man excited about life and looks forward to life after death. A man that has a spot in heaven and will help me in my spiritual journey. Because that’s what life is … a journey of grace. God’s grace.

Lord, will this ever be true for me?

And while I’m asking. Can I have a man who is a gentleman? A man who has goals in life and who knows how to manage his money? Can my man have a beautiful, dark complexion, and dark, soft eyes? Can he be a man who loves his family? It is even okay if he’s a mama’s boy.

Lord, would you answer my prayers for a husband? Would you bring me this man?

I will wait as long as it takes.

On July 12, 2008, I married the man of my prayers. I cannot praise God enough.

So in honor of Father’s Day, I would like to write an open letter to God thanking Him for the gift He has given me (and now Samuel) in Mark.

Dear God,

I am humbled that the prayer of an unbeliever was heard. In May 2007, days after I prayed this prayer for a husband, you gave me something greater. You graciously saved me. Through a series of events, You were in the process of winning me to Yourself. For that I am eternally grateful.

Thank you for providing me with my leader, my lover, my friend, my Mark.

I am so thankful for a husband who daily sacrifices for me and my son. Thank you for a man who respects and honors me, who lives with me in an understanding way, and who counts me as more significant than himself. He gives without expecting a single thing in return. He places Samuel and me before himself every single time.

I praise you for a husband who leads us through family devotions and prays with me many nights before we lay our heads down to sleep. Praise You Father, for my uncompromising husband when it comes to his love and care for me. Thank you for a man that I find joy in submitting to!

One thing I tell Samuel often is, “You will never, ever doubt your Daddy’s love for you. He’s good at a lot of things, but loving passionately is at the top.” My Mark’s passion for You, God, for me, for our son, and for others is what I love the most about him. He truly wants to change the world.

Mark leads me with strong hands. He is my protector and my shield from the storms of this world. I am so thankful that I am married to a humble man who seeks input from men around him and kneels at the foot of the cross daily because he’s aware of his great need for You.

I praise you for a man who does not care what the world thinks but what You think. I am so thankful for my husband because he knows his reward is in heaven. He trusts in Your Word. He fears You more than man.

And while I’m at it, Lord. Thank you for my tall, dark, and handsome man. When I imagined my man, I imagined my Mark. I am so grateful that I get to spend the rest of my life gazing into the softness and tenderness that can only be found in the way that he looks at me – every single time I walk in the room.

Thank you, God, for giving me the man of my prayers.

Happy First Father’s Day, Mark!

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  1. Marciemcbee says

    I am crying as I read this. The crying is two folded. I am thinking that if only I had said that prayer 20 years ago maybe I would not have missed out on 13 years of pure bliss.

    I did not know what a God centered marriage was or how to find a Godly husband. Sure I went to church and a good man fell in love with me and me with him and he went to church to (he had to if he wanted to see me on Sundays). Sure I prayed for a good husband but I did not know what was “Good”. It amazes me how much we think we know when we have no clue. We were married on Dec 6 1996.

    About 9 years into this marriage it was crumbling. I started to half heartedly ask God for help. I really just wanted what I though was best for me. Little do we know. So we just kept on struggling. Then about 3 years latter things got really bad (that is a story for another day).

    Like most people when there is no were left to turn we (yes there was finally a we) turned to God. It took us both turning at the same time to realize how little we knew about what we were doing.

    The second reason that I am crying now is that in the last next three years we decided to look to the ONE that graciously created us and the designer of marriage and it has been AMAZING. When in a marriage you and your spouse truly look to God first then your spouse second and your children third you don’t worry about what you need any more because all your needs are met and some you never new you had.


    Thanks LeAnn for helping me see how I can show my children the proper way to look for a spouce and thanks Jason for being the best husband that I could ever ask for. All it took was talking to the creator of marriage.
    Marcie McBee

    • says

      Thank you so much for your comment. What humility in sharing. Isn’t it amazing that even before we come into the kingdom of God, he already has a place, and he already has a plan for us? We are a part of his kingdom and a part of his amazing mercy and grace, even when we are unaware!

      As I read, I have to wonder how much of this grace have I missed being caught up in my own world and my own agenda? How much more could I be enjoying our Lord and Savior that I am missing out on?

      Two main things I take from your comment:
      1. “A Christ centered marriage is better than I could have ever imagined on my own.” I can only echo a resounding AMEN! I think the same could be said for a Christ centered LIFE!
      2. A right understanding of God, husband, and then, children is a wonderful reminder of the God given order of our priorities. I think as moms this is particularly challenging, but one that we should guard with all our might to keep straight.

      Thanks for the comment. Thanks for building my faith as you pointed so beautifully to our God of REDEEMING GRACE AND MERCY!

      P.S. I was sitting down with a large glass of amazing milk when I saw your comment 😉

  2. Sorgemom2 says

    Found this blog from Time-Warp Wife. This is absolutely beautiful!! Thank you for sharing. It’s so moving to see how God answers the desires of our heart! ♥

    • says

      I am daily amazed at God’s willingness to answer our prayers and give us the desires of our heart. I am even more amazed when the desires of my sinful heart are changed to align with His! So grateful we serve an amazing God who does not leave us in our sinful state!

      • says

        I just want to thank you for the words of encouragement. I’m 34 years oaks a singe mother to a beautiful 7 years old daughter. I’m currently praying for a Christian husband and having been doing that for years now. It’s only now that I know that my faith is in the right place and I believe that God almighty will bless me with a Christian husband in his perfect timing.

        Thank you again and may God bless you abundantly,

  3. stacey says

    This is great! God bless you! I wish I could pray this prayer & see it come true a yr from now. I’m 43 y/o & have been praying for a spouse for YEARS. I know that it’s probably too late to have a family but I would just love for God to send me a Godly man. I’m a little disheartened that it hasn’t happened yet. It seems like these blessings just fall in other’s laps but it is hard for me to understand why he hasn’t blessed me in this way.

    • says

      Oh, Stacey, thank you so much for taking time to comment. I wish I could understand why God does not see fit to give husbands to those who want them. Truthfully, it makes zero sense to me. But God is infinitely wiser, and He sees the entire picture – He sees and knows what I simply cannot. Our thoughts are not His thoughts and our ways are not His ways. I pray that the Lord would give you peace in this season of waiting, and I pray that He would reveal to you the mysteries of His ways.

      Romans 15:13 – May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope.

      That is my prayer for you, sweet one! Thanks again for commenting. I will be praying for you!

  4. Catarquinio says

    Wow Leigh Ann. You are truly blessed. God does hear our prayers! May God continue to bless you and your family.

  5. Catalina Silva 07 says

    awww thats amazing. i want the man of my dreams. i ll just do what you did wait till god to give him to me.

  6. Anjali says

    I’m searching for the man of my life! But I always been used and seen as a cheap girl, which I am not!
    I was married before in my young age, but realised my mistake and when I returned to him he was with another woman!
    I feel that I need someone… But, I know the right time has not come yet!
    I pray every single time to see the man of my life…
    Will I meet him is he one of my friends circle.. ?
    I look for him all the time… But whr is he? I look at the stars and tell him that I wait for his hand to walk with me for a long walk of life!

    God got someone for me and I know I will meet him one day!

  7. aussie girl says

    in a nut shell.. i am australian. i always had a strong passion to marry an american and move to america. I always only found americans attractive.. when I was 21 I met a christian american sailor.. it was love at first site for me.. he got in trouble and we coudlnt spend the next day together.. he was writing me and then abruptly stopped.. I believed instantly that he was ‘the one’ he was christian also, and he was a perfect picture of everything I ever prayed for.

    When he stopped writing I felt sad and confused, and I met another guy.. who was not chrisitan.. we ended up dating.. a month later I heard back from the christian sailor.. he had lost his email privelages for a month.. He never actually said he wanted a relationship with me, or i would have instnatly ended the new relationship I was in.. I wasn’t happy with the guy I was dating as I felt in love with the american sailor.

    7 months later we broke up. I was still writing the sailor. lets call him Bill..
    I was saving up everything I could to go to america for 3 months to do a christian camp and visit some friends including him..
    18 months later (2 years after we met) mid 2005 I broke my foot and was unable to walk. I had to live off my savings, became depressed, and felt liost.. My goal of going to america for 3 months was pushed back god knows how long.. my heart was breaking.. and burdened.
    an australian christian man from my church began pursuing me heavily.. and pushing the topic of marriage.. I had been reading ‘i kissed dating good bye’ and ‘boy meets girl’ amonst other christian books.. hoping that reading so many books would help me ‘get it right’ first time around.

    This man.. lets call him ‘Todd’ – He was not my type, and he was also australian. I wanted to marry an american and move to america.. I have always adored blue eyed men taller than me. I myself am almost 6 foot tall as a woman it is important to me to have a man taller and larger than me for me to feel protected and feminine.
    this man was brown eyed, australian, shorter than me, and not my type.. we had no chemistry, no spark, and no compatibility.
    Yet i had become convinced by the Joshua Harris novels (boy meets girl) that I was supposed to date and marry somebody i was not attracted to, who was a good christian, as it was gods will.. and to marry somebody you are attracted to was superficial..
    I became convinced that God broke my foot so that i would marry this man and stay in australia

    we went and spoke to pastors because we both felt we had no chemistry, and the pastors told us chemistry was superficial and we looked good together.
    we got married and i never wanted him t touch me.. i never wanted to have children with him, the idea of him touching me made me feel ill

    and i kept wondering ir only i had made it to america, to see the american guy (bill)
    Todd worked on an oil rigg. and worked away. he was home maybe 12 days a month, and when he was away he never called, never emailed, never wrote.. he just said he had nothing to talk to me about. when he was home he just played xbox.

    august 2010 he left me.. we had a
    ‘no fault’ divorce. not a biblcal divorce..
    I had spent a lot of time praying for God to make us fall in love with eachother and be compatible but we were not.. I had also prayed for my own death because I saw it as the only way out.

    After he left I had 3 choices
    be single forever..
    wait forever with the door open incase he wanted to come back…
    or c) move on with my life.. confess.. and pray that God would bring the real right man into my life.

    I had always felt judgemental of divorced people.. being raised catholic and knowing what Matthew and Corinthians say about divorce, I felt like I may as well be dead.. like this one mistake had sentenced me to a life alone..

    I was raised just by my mother, who died several years ago.
    when i called Todd on the oil rigg (before he left me) to say ‘my mother is dead’ his response was ‘oh.. thats a shame.’
    he didn’t care.. for any of those reading this and judging me.. imagine if your only family.. your mother died.. and your husbadn didnt’ care

    I then met another american. who seemed chrsitian and the answer to all my prayers
    I was amazed that God could be so good and answer so fast.
    he asked me to marry him, and told me that it was like god took the desires of his heart and created me.. I loved this man dearly.. lets gall him Brian..we were engaged by feb 2011 to be married in june 2011. 4 weeks before the wedding he asked if we could move the wedding forward 2 weeks.
    it was a small vegas wedding so I’d said ok.. 11 days before the new wedding date, he confessed to cheating 2 days after proposing in febuary.. and he said he was a commitmentphobe who didn’t want to get marreid.. and that under the circumstances, we coudlnt’e be freinds.. and that he wasn’t the christian he made out he was.

    I was devestated..
    Dec 2011 a man I met briefly and liked a year earlier online began pursuing me.. another christian american who was in japan for work.
    We began skyping 5 hours a day.. and he felt he was falling in love with me quickly.
    Feb 2012 he flew me to japan, and spoke about getting married at the end of 2012 if everything went well.

    When i arrived he did nothing but critisize me all day.. He didnt like my shoes, my style of walk, said I was clumsy iwth my luggage.. didn’t like the small of my soap, and said i needed to buy nicer perfume.
    I found out he was also into recreational drugs..

    5 months later.. 22 weeks later and I’m still single..
    July and August i have spent travelling around the United States, and I ende dup seeing Bill (from 9 years ago) for 3 days we spent hanging out..

    after my ex husband left me at the end of 2010 I had sent Bill an email telling him i had always wondered what could have happened if we’d been able to spend more time together. He felt the same way, and told me that there was a spark for him, and that he felt jealous when I got married.
    I knew he had a girlfriend but didnt know if they were ready to get married, or ready to break up, so i told him i didnt want to keep wondering.. and i could come to america in august 2011 and then we could find out, and woudlnt have to wonder..
    He didn’t reply to that one.. he went quite and didn’t speak to me again until Brian and I became engaged early 2011 and then he began talking to me again

    last year when I was in america (after being broken up with by Brian my american fiance) I spent time with Bill who told me he had a girlfriend with a brain tumor.. that she wasn’t the one, and that he hadn’t married her for that reason, but that he loved her and didnt’w nat to break up with her and hurt her before she died.. so basically he is staying with her until she dies.
    we spent 2 days hanging out last year.. and he told me all of this.. this week we spent another 3 days togehter (as friends) and again he commented that he believes people should live for themselves.. but that that was hypocritical since he couldnt break up with his sick girlfriend.

    He would make fond reminiscent comments about the time we spent kissing when we were 21.. something I’m sure guys don’t do unless they’re still interested.
    He’s also said he doesnt see himself ever getting marreid because eh doesn’t want somebody else making decisions in his life.

    this leaves me in one position
    An australian christian girl who has been in love 3 times
    Brian, Bill, and the guy in Japan (lets call him Brady)..
    Brian, Bill, and Brady are all american guys, with hilarious sences of humour.. blue eyes, taller and bigger/heavier than me.. and christian.. with short hair… city boys..
    my ex husband was australian.. short and skinny.. smaller than me.. a country boy with long hair and brown eyes.. not my type at all.. but many christians pressured me into dating him because he wa s’nice’ and ‘he is really into you’

    I long to be married
    I long to be married to a guy who is MY TYPE like Brian, Bill and Brady, but I long to have a man who does not mistreat me, does not have commitment issues.. and doesn’t cheat, lie, critisize, or stay in a relationship for the wrong reason.

    July I turned 30.. I feel like my 20’s were wasted.
    The fact that I have always had this burning passion to move to America (just so you know America does not allow white Australians to move to America.. marrying an american is the only way unless you are a dr or lawyer.. a level 7 occupation that is widely seeked)
    It works the other way as well. Australia does not allow an american to move to Australia.. marrying an Australian is the only way.. Because I have always only been attrcted to ‘my type’ and always pursued moving to america as best I can (ie travelling there as much as I can now) my friends from australia don’t understand.. ‘oh just date this guy.. and get married’
    they don’t have the same desire as me (australia is beautiful, we have a rich economy, there are no homless.. people working at mcdonalds make over $20 an hour) medical is free.. there is no crime, no polution… just trees and ocean) but i don’t feel i belong there.. I have always felt like I belong in america.. my friends who don’t understand this desire, i just explain to them that i cant pretend i dont have the desire.. i have tried that (with todd) and it failed

    some of my christian freinds are very supportvie and they say ‘god gives us desires so that we will pursue what we were made for.. so dont’ ignore your desire.. chase it and pray’

    I do pray.. I pray all the time.. but I am now 30, and i see lines forming around my eyes… my mother was old when she had me.. almost 39, and she used to always say ‘i am to old to play with you’
    I don’t want to have children later than 35.. say 33 years and 35. it is proven the older a woman is the more likely are defects and the harder it is on the womans body.. both health wise and fitness wise..

    I long to have 2 children between 33-35 and that means being married by 31 to enjoy at least 1-2 full years of marriage before having children.. to be married by 31 means i need to meet the guy now

    its not happening

    my non christian friends all tell me i am too picky and that what I desire is too specific and i should jujst date anice man who asks me out.. I already did that.. and it destroyed my life

    I’m afraid god has forgotten me.. i am so scared
    I pray for the right man..
    I pray for a man that I can love a thousand times more than I ever felt for Brian Brady or Bill.. I pray that when this man comes into my life it is so obvious that he is the one.. that it’s obvious why it never worked with anyone else, and that he feels the same

    I pray for this man.. from the depths of my heart.. but Im struglging to believe he will ever come into my life.. i am struggling to believe he exists.

    I am a wedding photographer, i spend every week at weddings and so many grooms and brides say in their speach ‘the moment I met x.. I just KNEW he/she was the right one’
    that is the feeling I want.. and that is the feeling I want him to have too.. no question about me being right.. it just fitting so amazing

    no settling
    no pretending to want somebody i dont
    just the real deal

    praying earnestly.. but i am now 30 and discouraged..

  8. says

    I read this prayer & it hit a nerve in a good way
    This is an amazing story, i too have been praying off & on for 2 years for a husband
    There is someone in my life but its early days, i pray if it is not him then for god to send me my ideal match soon as possible
    Thankyou for sharing this, i shall look at it every day for inspiration of hope for me


  9. ag says

    I pray for love. True love that makes me smile during the day when I am at work, that makes me want to rush back home, that makes me look forward to simple daily tasks whether it is grocery shopping or luandry…because it’s together. I pray for love that is full of laughter. I pray for love that lasts. I pray for love that can withstand, love that understands, love that forgives, love that stimulates the mind, love that doesn’t hold grudges and love that knows that we are a team! No matter what! Please God, will you grant me the gift of love that is beautiful inside and out, love that makes us one, love that is made to last. Yours

  10. autumn says

    Thank you for sharing this amazing topic and stories.
    I am thankful that God had chosen a man and has just given me the man of my desire. Praise the Lord.
    Since the first day we’ve met (not yet in person), the two of us feel that there is a God-given bonding between us. Then we talk on the phone every day and night to get to know each other. We’re planning to get together and to take next steps for marriage.
    Lord, i am always grateful for what you’ve done for both of us. We long to have a Christ centered marriage and we do commit to walk together with you for the rest of our life.

  11. Brown Eyes says

    I’m a 22 year old female who recently experienced major heartbreak. All my life I’ve been praying for a man who wants to start a life with me, and who truly knows and believes in God. Three years ago I met a very nice gentleman and we started a relationship. I made the choice to wait till marriage to have sex. I thought this man respected that and shared the same values (because that’s what he told me). After being with him for 2.5 years, he cheated on me and slept with an older woman. Not only that, but I found out that he had lied about his sexual past (he said he was a virgin, but he lied and actually had 2 partners).
    I left him. I don’t believe someone who claims he “loves me more than anything” could cheat on me and lie about important things. I also don’t believe someone who “knows and believes in God” could do what he did.
    I’m just sad and depressed. I know I’m young, but I truly believe I’m ready to start a life with someone (I thought that’s where things were headed with my ex). Please do not judge me by my age (many people I’ve met tell me I’m very mature for my age).
    In my heart I feel ready. All I want is to meet a genuine man who knows the Lord and puts the Lord first, as I do. I want to have a meaningful relationship and marriage with a man who is ready to be a Christian husband. I want to raise our children together in Christian values and morals.
    It’s so difficult these days because so many men aren’t willing to wait till marriage for sex. I’m not sure what to do anymore, I know God answers prayers because he did answer my prayers previously. I guess I’m just afraid, I’m afraid that if I don’t meet my future husband soon I might lose hope.
    I pray a lot, and I do feel closer to God (probably the closest I’ve ever felt). But I’m also very sad because of what my ex did and because of society these days (how people treat each other and use one another).
    Your story is truly inspiring, I’m just feeling sad and I pray that I get this lucky.
    I don’t know what to do, other than pray. Any words of advice would be appreciated.
    Thank you.

    • says

      Thanks for your comment. I know how discouraging it can be. I’ve been there. I certainly do not knock you for your age, but instead find great encouragement in knowing you’re seeking Biblical truths and God’s will. And I pray this prayer for you:

      “For this reason, I bow my knees before the Father, from whom every family in heaven and on earth is named, that according to the riches of his glory he may grant you to be strengthened with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith — that you, being rooted and grounded in love may have strength to comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth, and to know the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled with all the fullness of God. Now to him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us, to him be the glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever. Amen.” ~Ephesians 3:14-21

      And remember that it is not from God those who use and abuse their position as men, or how society works in general. It is not His will, it is the work of the Devil. So seek God, seek His face above all else, and tell Satan to get behind you. He has no place in your thoughts. Jesus is King. The battle is already won. Our greatest need has been met through Christ’s blood. So take heart and know that He is your love, and He should be your first love. Seek Him, lay it all at His feet, serve Him for the joy set before you, and trust that His plan far exceeds yours. Just as my fulfillment is not found in finding a mate, your fulfillment will not be found in finding a mate. So I encourage you to use your singleness for God’s glory. Serve the poor, care for the sick, go on a mission trip, babysit for a young mom…use your singleness, don’t waste it. God has a marvelous plan for you, my friend. I am praying with you!
      Leigh Ann recently posted..Create in Me a Clean Heart, O GodMy Profile

  12. says

    WOW, I’m very bless by your testimony. I continue to trust God and believe him for the man of my heart.
    It will happen in God’s timing and your testimony is a boost for me to continue to push in faith :)
    Be bless ANN

  13. Nana says

    2-3 years ago I did not want to get married. Never! Never! Never! I would not have bulged even with a ghun held to my head. I had serious fear of commitment. But I have always always been very happy.
    Anyway, I would date guys and the moment they got closer I upped and left. The last guy I dated I had met when I was 32 and was with him unti I was 36. I catred for him and loved him deeply. I did not bolt vfrom this one because he was separated from his wife and I knew he would not been able to marry me unless divorced, as such he was safe.
    Anyway, the reason for our separation was he cheated on me and so I left him.
    After the break up, I spent the time making ammends, praying, asking for forgiveness (because the truth is as long as the guy was not divorced from church, I had sinned as I was with somebody else’s husband) and asking God to heal me.
    Everyday I saw how His healing hands was working on me. Everyday I heard his voice and I listened to His directions. I was never lonely. Never! Anyway, I learnt to let go and let God and I finally got over my fears.
    I had a lot of love to share, and this I discussed with our heavenly Father. I asked humbly, I prayed, I fasted, I praised, I listened, I believed, I waited patiently while joyfully smiling as I always did and he came.
    I met him a month before my 39th birthday and our first date was on St. Valentine’s day.
    I am 40 now and happily and blessedly married to a beautiful, beautiful Christian man.
    Thank you, Lord Jesus!

    With this, ladies, humbly ask and believe. Do not dwell on what you do not have but instead be thankful for absolutely every blessing.
    All the best and blessings!

  14. Eenu says

    I’ve prayed for a good husband for years, who is good in front of God, who holds good faith, but what I got is someone who is not very strong in faith, had fornicated and thus is not good in the sight of God, however when I asked him to go confess, he did it. But I’m not sure whether he did it for me or for himself. Why didn’t God hear my prayer which I prayers for years? I still believe/trust in God, but I don’t know why God didn’t answer my prayer.?

  15. kim miller says

    I’m a virgin, christian, go to church faithfully. I have never been in a relationship because i thought god would bless me with a good godly christian man. He gives me someone and let them mistreate me. Some god. I pray and pray for a good husband and god mistreat me. He has been mistreating me and putting me through stuff my entire life just because i don’t look the way god wants me to look. How wrong is that. I pray and pray and pray and he ignores me because i didnt make the same mistakes as others because im not a whore and i never will be one just to get a blessing from him i even have a college degree. Im. A good person what more does he want from me. Im 30 and he skikps over me. I loss my mom, dad, sister , close cousin, god mom, aunt and uncle i was close to. I have noone and god won’t bless me with a good godly christian husband. Ive even been told noone wants me and thats why i cant get a man and god still skips over me just because im not a whore. Stop bragging on a blessing that others don’t have he spread the good news not boast about it because look at all the mistakes you made to get that husband i’ve been praying for years and trying to do all the right things and get skipped over because im not a whore or drop dead gorgeous. You are wrong for what you did because if it was the other way around you wouldn’t want anyone to do you like that. Smh and you say your a christian you should be humble.

    • says

      Kim, wow, I have to say I was totally taken aback by your comment. But more than that I understand your frustration, and even why you would be mad at me, angry even. Because the truth is you’re right. I don’t deserve my husband, my child(ren), or the very breath I breathe. As a child of God, a daughter of the King, who is saved merely by His never failing grace, you’re right…I earned nothing. I deserve death, punishment, and above all separation from God. But instead, we serve a God who doesn’t work that way. Praise the Lord! We serve a God who is gracious, forgiving, and full of the power to redeem the broken and make beauty from the ashes. My dear sister, I implore you to look past the circumstances and instead to the One who created you for His glory. I applaud your chastity, but God doesn’t want our sacrifices or good works (Psalm 51:16). He wants our hearts. For a broken and contrite heart, He will not despise (Psalm 51:17). “But the one who offers thanksgiving as his sacrifice glorifies me” (Psalm 50:23a). I know it’s hard when you feel like God has all but turned His back on you. I know what it’s like to pray for something and continually get a no for an answer. I know what it’s like to wait. I know it’s hard. But I believe the Bible to be true. God loves me. He will never forsake me because I believe He sent His son to live a perfect life, die a gruesome death – bearing the shame of all I have ever done or will do- and then defeating death by rising from the grave. I believe I am saved through faith alone by grace alone in Christ alone. Therefore, He works all things for my good and His glory even when I don’t like the circumstances. My friend, the same has been done for you and the Promise is for you as well. I pray your heart may be encouraged today with the awesome wonderful goodness of God, and that He would give you grace as you wait for your heart’s desire.

  16. kaleigh says

    I don’t think you could really understand…just how much of a blessing this was for me. It’s like, I have been searching and praying for someone who has gone through what I am and trusted God and God answered them. I don’t know if there are some sort of spiritual copyright infringement laws for prayer..(lol) But all the things you said in that journal entry, are the exact (so spectacularly exactly) the things that have been on my heart that I didn’t know how to put into words..and I didn’t if it was silly to pray for. Or if I was allowed too. But I feel like I have the answer now and loads of encouragement. :) But I just wanted you know that I appreciate you living for Christ..because you just won’t know how many people you have encouraged through this! God bless you and your family!! :)

    • says

      Kaleigh, thank you for your kind words. God has a plan for each of us, and you have an opportunity that I totally messed up. An opportunity to use your singleness well! If your heart is for marriage, do the hard work now to prepare – learn to live on a budget, figure out how to keep a home, serve other young families by babysitting, etc. oh how I wish I had spent less time putting myself in places “he would show up” and more serving And doing Kingdom work. Use your time for the glory of God, friend. You won’t regret it. Thanks for stopping by! And keep praying big audacious prayers!

  17. Kaitlyn says

    This is truly beautiful, but I just want others who may read my comment this… even if He “doesn’t” bring you “The One”. Even if you tried to be g-d, and “make” a relationship, then have a child with cerebral palsey and the father is gone. Even if you are in your late 40’s and the flower of your youth is gone…
    He IS still good, faithful and fully loves you as NO MAN on earth ever will!

    The Lord will love you when you old and wrinkled, in the mornings with dragons breath, with your PMS symptoms full swing and when you are not behaving “so nice”.

    G-d loves you no matter how fat or skinny you are, no matter your bra-size, or if your booty is round, or flat as a pancake.

    Even if the entire world rejects you, and you never get married – You ARE Loved by Him.

    Just saying, 😉

  18. BESTY says

    Life can be very displeasing especially when we loose the ones we love and cherish so much. in this kind of situation where one loses his/her soul mate there are several dangers engage in it. one may no longer be able to do the things he was doing before then success will be very scarce and happiness will be rare. that person was created to be with you for without him things may fall apart.
    That was my experience late last year. but thank god today i am happy with him again. all thanks to DR AKPAKPA, i was nearly loosing hope until i saw an article on how DR AKPAKPA could cast a love spell to make lovers come back. There is no harm in trying, i said to my self. i contacted him via email: words will not be enough to appreciate what he has done for me. i have promised to share the good news as long as i live.


  19. Alby says

    Thank you for sharing your story. I recently had to make a hard decision and choose God over the man I love to pieces and pray for every day. I don’t know what God has yet planned for me, but I hope that one day He can make my dreams come true too! I will continue to trust and pray…

  20. Ayesha says

    Hello sister, Thank you for sharing such a wonderful story and giving others hope to keep praying :)
    You both look so amazing together and the baby is just adorable <3
    May God shower your family with blessings


    My the peace of the lord be with you all,

    This message is coming from the SYNAGUE CHURCH OF ALL NATIONS which is located in Lagos Nigeria and our father in the lord,Prophet T.B Joshua Whom the lord has used to change the life of most people around the would,A man whom God has ordinands to come to the word and help the less privileged and perform all kinds of miracle,Behold God has used Prophet T.B Joshua to series of miracles such as:
    -Making the blind to see again
    -Curing various kinds of illness such as
    -Helping does who are in need of financial help
    -C hasting of satanic spell
    -Solving of family problems
    -Creating of job for people all over the word with the help of God
    So if your are in any kinds of problems such as the above listed or you need God intervention in your Marriage,Business,in your life,in your various working place,Contact the Anointed man of God today true this email:

    Thanks and God bless even as we pray that the Almighty God intervene in your various problems today.

    Prophet T.B Joshua

  22. says


  23. Kathryn says

    Ok this is your success story but it doesn’t help me . I’m 38 and been single my whole life. Not only have I prayed for decades so have my parents . Not only has God let me down he has let them down .

    Hearing stories like you’d doesn’t encourage me .

    I’ve been told God called me to be single to serve him instead . Ok instead ? Why ?
    That idea alone not just wrecked my faith it wrecked me

    I have never been on a date and watched everyone else
    get to . What’s the purpose in this ?? To ruin my life ?

    If God did it for you why hasn’t he for me ?

    God has let me down !!!!!!
    I won’t live a lie / God has failed me

    • Guest1001 says

      When I was 13 years old, I was looking at a picture of the Lord and the words of God spoke using my mouth to make a covenant with him. I told God that I did not want a boyfriend, but only wanted a husband in the future where he picked him out. I was a young girl and I did not think about marriage or having a boyfriend at that age, but that day when I was looking at the picture of the Lord those words came out of my mouth. I consider it as a miracle from God. God spoke his words using my voice to make this promise between me and Him. I am in my early 30’s and I have not broken that promise to God. I never had boyfriend and I considered God my everything. I did get made fun of by people for not having a boyfriend, wearing modest clothes, wearing glasses in the past, focused on important things in life than clubbing, getting drunk, and other things that you see many millennials doing to pass free time. I know that I am in the final phase and very close of God bringing my spouse to me. Many people considered me as a hopeless person because I am not married. They think I have problems because I am not married yet and there have been people who spread bad rumors about me as to why I am not married calling me picky, problematic, have high expectations, and worse things. I left it in God’s hands to answer all my critics or haters because I been very hurt by those things. Just because I wait for God to answer doesn’t mean I have problems. I even had family or relatives criticize me calling me old maid or hopeless to find a spouse for me. God knows everything and he will answer back my critics. I am infinite percent positive God has my spouse and he will bring him to me very soon. Now I feel so ready to get married because of the wisdom, strength, and preparation he done for me to be the right person for him. God wouldn’t have made a covenant of marriage for me if he wasn’t going to do it for me in the future. I know I will get my Godly man and I trust my God. I do not trust myself, my family, or others to pick out my spouse, but I trust the Lord with all my heart and soul. I know he will bring a gorgeous Godly man that is filled with inner qualities that shine more than the stars in the sky. He will be very beautiful to my eyes, heart, mind, and soul. God wants to first have you to love him and then he does his molding for you to become the person that he wants you to be in life. You have to love God first with all your heart and have him as number one in life. The same goes for your Godly spouse. Think about God being on a mountain looking down at you and your spouse walking separately up the mountain. God has you both on the right pace or time walking. Eventually you, God, and the Godly guy will meet at together at the top. God is making sure that the man is molded to the right person for marriage and the same goes for you. You have to trust on God and not lean on your understanding. His pick, timing, and all is right for you even if you don’t understand why it’s taking so long for him to give you the spouse. To all the people out there who are not married just leave it in God’s hands and walk with the Lord. Let him do the spouse picking.

  24. says

    I have been divorced for 7 years and I have dated a few along the way. I have not found the one I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. Until yesterday! I went out on my first date with a man of God who’s faith is stronger than any I’ve known. He was brought to the area by the Lord for some reason. I pray that reason is for me. I borrowed your prayer as that is how I feel. Thank you for putting my feelings down on paper!

    God Bless you and your family!

  25. dayze says

    Personally, I’m blessed with your testimony! Though I’m still young but totally this is really inspiring! I’ve been single for many years after tired being on a false relationship. I believe with faith that God will give me the right man on His right time :) No doubt because I’ve seen His faithfulness toward your prayer! Hallelujah

  26. Newana says

    How wonderful to read your story and all the comments here. I was brought up to be an atheist, but three years ago I met a boy who helped me see. Now God is all I live for. We stayed together, the boy and I, for three years. But through the years, he turned to the world and his back on God. He started swearing, cursing, going to the pub, making atheist friends, dancing with other girls. Now every christian sins, but seeing the sin and asking for forgiveness, is what makes us christian. He no longer saw. I tried for a year to help him come back to God. Now I have given up, but feel that I’m to blame. I have influenced him badly in the time that I myself was blind and deaf to God’s Word. I pray God will hold his hand again, and come back in his life. We were going to get married, I’m now 26 and starting a family is all I want. But perhaps God wants me to build on Him, not on the boy that I once met. The cross of leaving him is very heavy, almost unbearable to carry, for I am so thankful to him, to help me see. Lord, please let him come back to you.

  27. yednekachew teka (china) says

    dear God i was asking you a lot of question that i need i thankyou for giving me the most amezing wife i don’t deserve someone like her. i was asking more thing and you give me everything now it is a time to ask you to give me a commitment to love you and to serve you in my whole life. give me a commitment to pray for a person who didn’t know you. please give me a courage to love everybody arround me just as you need me to love. give me the love that never end. give me a faith that is not shaking in difficulty. give me a pure heart like a new child so that i can see you give me. thankyou for answering this new prayer

  28. Dessie says

    Praise God, sister. I feel like you’ve just read my mind more than 20 years ago and said my prayers almost exactly the way I said them-perhaps a thousand times.

    To cut the story short, I am a wayward child of God. Yes, I’m “faithful” to Him in a way that I believe He’s our healer, coming King, Sanctifier and Savior. I believe that He’s the answer to everything except that in matters of the heart, I chose to take my future in my hands which I in some ways regret but at the same time, feels thankful for the blessings given that He has given me two wonderful kids.

    When I was teenager, I promised myself that I’ll only ever love and date one person who will eventually be my future husband. Seeing my best friend heart broken after a series of failed relationships, I still remember the letter that a sister in Christ wrote her. The letter goes like, “Lord, please prepare the right person for me just as you are preparing me for him”. Though the letter wasn’t addressed to me, I kept those words in my heart so that I could pray about my future husband over and over again,EVERYDAY of my life.

    When I reached college, I went to church with my other best friend every Sunday. We weren’t active in church but we were faithful to the Lord. That time, she really fancied the worship leader but I didn’t as he wasn’t really my kind of guy. In hindsight, I think we “flirted” our way in church because we used to sit in front just to get a good glimpse of him. To me it was a game to make my friend feel good. As the years go by, I realized that he liked me and not my friend. He must’ve prayed hard for me because before I graduated, I started liking him too. He used to get off the stage to shake hands but we NEVER talked. I started working, he started working…I missed going to church and my best friend didn’t go either. However, that didn’t mean that I’ve forgotten him. To be very honest, I still prayed and prayed and prayed and prayed…every single day….a few times a day so that God could bridge the great divide between us plus, I learned from someone that he liked me too. That then gave me lots of flutters inside heart. I went to sleep every night smiling at the thought that he will be mine some day because we both love the Lord and I guess liked each other. My cousin even made remarks a few times saying that I was smiling in my sleep all the time. I guess my happiness was trascending from my heart into my face.

    However, I guess God had another plan for me. I had to move interstate. I began to panic. What will happen to my dream of marrying that wonderful child of God? I want to raise a faithful family! I want a great man of God, a true leader, a faithful servant! I was desperate that we’ll never make it together and so I started calling him which until now I fully and deeply regret. Whenever I think of those moments, I feel so much shame inside me. I lost my dignity and my honor as a woman. I didn’t wait for the Lord to coax him to make the first move. But then again given my tender age at that time, I was worried that if I didn’t do the move, he’ll never know that I was going away. I feel like crying out of shame even after nearly 20 years. I asked him to wait for me but never revealed who I was. Like I said, maybe God had another plan for me.When I left, my friend revealed to him that it was me….which made me even more ashamed.As the bible says, “What you have said in the dark will be heard in the daylight, and what you have whispered in the ear in the inner rooms will be proclaimed from the roofs.”- Luke 12:3.

    I felt disgusted with myself and I couldn’t bring myself to go home because of that. In some ways, I feel that I owe him an apology for making him wait for me but at the same time, he never took a single step to get in touch with me even after knowing it was me. I feel like screaming at the top of my lungs at times for ruining my own prayer for a future husband. Fast forward 3 years after that “event”, I met my now husband who happens to be an unbeliever. He ticked all the boxes that I wanted from a man except for the most important part-he’s not a christian. Afraid to be single forever as I was past mid-20’s, I decided to settle and get married even though the bible says that we shouldn’t be yoked with an unbeliever. I took the matters in my hands because I was a coward and lacked faith in the Lord. “Behold the fowls of the air: for they sow not, neither do they reap, nor gather into barns; yet your heavenly Father feedeth them. Are ye not much better than they?”-Matthew 6:26. I should’ve entrusted my future in His hands and not followed my own soulish desire. I feared of becoming an old maid and not have partner in the future. As a mature person that I am now, I’ve realized that because of my own selfishness, I have to put up with the consequences of marrying an unbeliever. True, I’ve got two wonderful children who love the Lord dearly and have even voluntarily given their lives to Him at a tender age of 3. Is my family a happy family? In some respect yes. Am I happy? Again in some respect yes because I’ve got a husband and 2 kids. Am I satisfied? No, I’m not. My husband is difficult to live with. I’m with him because of the kids. We’re more like buddies who constantly disagree. Intimacy is almost non-existent. He never encourages me nor praise me. I feel so worthless and hopeless. He constantly belittles me because of my weight and this lead to me feeling depressed constantly. I don’t have any drive inside me improve myself or lose weight. I feel so unloved and just unmotivated. I know that I have to do something about this but I console myself that maybe, God has put me in this situation (out of my comfort zone) just like what he did to Joseph when his brothers sold him off. I know, I know…it’s my own silly choice that’s why I’m like this. Had I waited for the Lord to His will, then I would’ve been the happy christian wife that I’m supposed to be right now. The sad part is, I still think of that guy even up to this time (did I say it’s been almost 20 years now since I did that shameful thing?). I don’t know if this is as a result of a “soul tie” or maybe it’s my own defense mechanism at work because I feel unloved. Personally, in my heart I still want that guy but I couldn’t bring myself to see my own little family broken. That guy married recently and has a wonderful christian wife and son. I blame myself in some ways because had I not intervened, then he would’ve gotten married earlier even if it wasn’t me.

    It’s complicated. It really is. Looking at my husband and praying after a fight, I felt a tug from the Lord last night. He reminded me that although my husband’s not a christian yet, his love for me is strong. And whenever we fight, it’s not really him that I’m fighting with but the principalities and spirits that are in him because of his unbelief. I don’t know. I feel confused. Have I ruined God’s plan for me to marry a christian or am I really meant to be with my unbelieving husband? I was sad last night and considering the option of divorce. However, the Lord reminded me once again that my husband though an unbeliever, tried his best to win my heart whereas the christian guy that I wanted never took a single step…And with that in mind, deep in my heart I know that the Lord wants me to stay married as he hates divorce and instead practice what Proverbs 31 says of an ideal woman.

  29. Mildred says

    I read this prayer & it hit a nerve in a good way
    This is an amazing story, i too have been praying off & on for many years for a husband
    There is someone who was in my life but its early days, i pray if it is not him then for god to send me my ideal match soon as possible
    Thankyou for sharing this, i shall look at it every day for inspiration of hope for me


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