Respect Your Husband

10 Ways to Show Gratitude to Your Husband

This post is written by contributing writer, Mary Beth from New Life Steward.

With the Thanksgiving season comes the almost cliche question, “What are you thankful for?” Nearly as a reflex, we respond family, friends, my faith, etc. Cliches become cliches because there is at least some bit of truth to them. Nearly all of us are truly thankful for our families, friends, and faith. As I sit here reflecting on that reality, I realize that the very ones I am most thankful for in my life–namely my husband–are the ones I am least likely to show my thanks. I just assume he knows, and he probably does. But I want to show him. I want him to feel my gratitude.

In that line of thinking, I’ve compiled a list of 10 ways to show gratitude to my husband. Over the month of November, I’m going to put each one into practice. I hope you’ll join me! Let’s shower our husbands with gratitude this month.

1. Tell him. Out loud. With words and specifics. This seems like such a no brainer, but I honestly can’t remember the last time I actually thanked my husband for a specific task he did for me or quality about him that I appreciate. Sometime this month, I’m going to intentionally look my husband in the eye and tell him exactly what I’m thankful for about him in that moment.

2. Write it on a post-it note. My idea here is to just write something simple on a post-it note and leave it somewhere for him to find during the day. My husband carries a briefcase to work some days, so I might slip it in there. Or put it on his steering wheel to find in the morning.

3. Write it in a letter and actually mail it. We can say a lot more in a letter than on a post-it note! I’m saving the really good stuff for the letter. Plus, who doesn’t love to get mail?!

4. Cook his favorite meal and/or dessert. This doesn’t need much explanation. Cooking his favorite meal shows your love and appreciation for him by demonstrating that you thought about him and made a plan you knew he would like.

5. Initiate physical intimacy. I’ve been married for 5 years, and I’m still shy about initiating physical intimacy. However, I know my husband really appreciates it when I do. So let’s be intentional, ladies!

6. Offer your husband a massage and allow things to naturally progress. As a women, I often want to snuggle or let him rub my back without things progressing to physical intimacy. He, on the other hand, reads that as all systems go! So let it happen. (Maybe you can knock numbers 5 & 6 out at once!)

7. Do a chore you know he hates doing. This one is going to be a bit of a challenge for me because I’m not sure what chore that would be. Most of his chores he doesn’t want me to do because he thinks I’ll mess it up or hurt myself (i.e. the budget and yard work)! Hopefully I can figure one out!

8. Let him have the pillow. This one needs explaining. I have this awesome feather pillow that I snuggle with at night. The hubby often steals it, and I usually snatch it back rudely. So I’m gonna let him have the pillow. Just once. Whatever “the pillow” is in your relationship, let him have it. Just once. :)

9. Pray for him. Personally, there is nothing I cherish more than knowing that someone cares about me enough to spend time praying for me. I want to show my appreciation for my husband by lifting him up to the Lord and thanking God for the blessing he is in my life.

10. Hold your tongue. When you want to nag or get angry, stop and keep those words in your mouth. Show appreciation to your husband by respecting him enough to hold your tongue. Try to choose to let the issue go, but if you can’t, give yourself time to cool off before addressing it.

What would you add to the list? Who is joining me? Tell me in the comments!

Photo Credit: Louise Docker


  1. says

    Mary Beth, what a wonderful post!! I am printing this out today! You know, my husband’s “thing” is not the pillow – it is the REMOTE CONTROL!! So I will let him have it … he hates commercials and fast forwards right through them. Seriously, you have given some lovely tips that I will implement in my home and marriage. My husband and I have been married almost two years, and we married when I was 42. I was single and independent up to that point, so I really want to be intentional with treating him with the respect and love he so richly deserves. I LOVE THAT MAN!!! Have a blessed weekend!

  2. Jeanne says

    Mary Beth this is wonderful. Simple is best for those of us who don’t remember things all the way from the back of the house to the kitchen. (-; The other thing my husband enjoys are ‘scurry-by’ kisses. When we are both busy I speed up shuffling my feet loudly so he notices me, and smooch him as I pass by. It makes him laugh and he feels loved.

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